simple little things

Do you ever get the feeling that you are always waiting?  Waiting for the end of a workday? The beginning of a movie? The moment the other person feels the same way you do? The moment you stop feeling the way you are feeling? 

The day you realize this is indeed your real life?

I have so many reasons I am not doing what I want to be doing with my time right now, and all of those reasons have to do with waiting.  I am waiting for the month that I make a little more money, so I will feel a little more secure.  Even though I have ample vacation time, I am waiting for a time when I feel it is ok to take more than one week off of work and explore  faraway places I’ve always wanted to visit.  I am waiting for the day when I feel enough time has passed since Mom left that I can focus on the things I need to change in the life I have now.

What exactly am I waiting for?

Somewhere along the way, I got this idea in my head that I would “sense” the moment when it was ok to take chances, and throw myself into my passions with no thought of failure or embarrassment.  I felt that when I had wrapped up all of my little loose ends, then I would be free to break out of my mold and explore the things that would shape the person I wanted so badly to become.  But this is me.  This is who I am.  And if I keep waiting for the perfect moment, I’m going to miss out on everything I have always wanted to be.

It is never too late to become what you might have been.